Mar
8
Malachi’s Gas
Filed Under Amy
Everyone told me you may just have a gassy baby… still, this may be true. I guess we’ll find out after our appointment today. I thought I’d write a little update here about what’s going on with little M and then I’ll update it when we find out what’s going on.
A week before Malachi turned four months old he started waking up and eating (around the clock) every two and a half to three hours. It must be a growth spurt, we thought, soon he’ll be back to at least our version of normal: sleeping 10 hours a night and eating every three and a half hours during the day. As the weeks continued to pass with no more than three hours of continual sleep a night I thought there must be something more than a growth spurt going on here.
I took him to the doctors a few times (to be honest, I felt like one of those crazy moms because we went almost every week for about a month!) and he was diagnosed with reflux. Basically with his other symptoms, I could have told you that, and I did but it wasn’t until two weeks ago that the doctors realized this. So he went on zantac and it worked for two days and then he started spitting up the medicine, great! Then he was switched to prevacid, this worked much better.
So acid reflux symptoms… gone. But he was still waking up and eating and having more gas than any little baby should have. “If I had those size farts, I would be pretty embarrasses” – Eric after hearing some of the “toots” that I worked out. Most of the time he can’t get the gas out either and we have to move his legs around in a circular motion to make it. Also, his stomach has been non-stop churning. All that to be said, his Pedi couldn’t figure out what was going on simply from listening from the outside, so they’re going in!
Upper Gastrointestinal (GI) Endoscopy is a visual examination of the upper intestinal tract using a lighted, flexible fiberoptic or video endoscope. The upper gastrointestinal tract begins with the mouth and continues with the esophagus (food tube) which carries food to the stomach. The J-shaped stomach secretes a potent acid and churns food into small particles. The food then enters the duodenum, or small bowel, where bile from the liver and digestive juices from the pancreas mix with it to help the digestive process.
This is the first thing they are going to do, they have to put Malachi under to perform this, and then I’m not sure what else is going to happen. To be honest, I’m pretty freaked out. I’m trying to trust God, I KNOW he is in control! I’m sure I’ll write more of whats going on inside and out once this is over. Please pray pray pray for the little man: that the Dr will have wisdom and can quickly figure out whats going on and fix it!
Feb
25
Proverbs 31- the first half
Filed Under Amy, Home Again
Most people, when hearing about Proverbs 31 think of the Wife of Noble Character. I generally forget that the commonly referred to section of this Proverb begins in verse 10. The nine verses before this are part of an oracle that King Lemuel’s mother taught him. It is a warning to stay away from women and strong drink (of course good advice coming from a mother), but the part that really sticks out to me is in the last two verses where it says,
Open your mouth for the mute, for the rights of all who are destitute. Hope your mouth, judge righteously, defend the rights of the poor and needy.
The “repeated phrase” is open your mouth for… it is a call to action. Don’t just sit there and let it happen, do something about it, SAY SOMETHING! If I take an honest look at my own life I am ashamed to say that often times (perhaps because of fear of man) I quietly shake my head in empathy. I am aware of what is going on but don’t allow myself to enter in to sympathy, truly feeling for myself the pain that is so clearly evident. If I did this then I would have no choice but to say something, right? What a scary thought to think that the world can go on without people speaking out for the mute, the destitute. I hope and pray that our walls, that my walls, of fear or whatever is holding us back from being that voice for the voiceless crumble to the ground. I want to be able to open my mouth and hear a cry for liberation, for freedom, for justice pour out. Jesus, help me see with your eyes and love with your heart!
Feb
17
Now that I have seen, I am responsible…
Filed Under Amy, Home Again
Brooke Fraser wrote a song called Albertine about a little girl she grew to love while she was in Rwanda. This song is all about bringing back what she experienced with her through her music. One line, “now that I have seen, I am responsible. Faith without deeds is dead” is one that has stuck with me through all that God has taken us, personally through.
As I was sitting, waiting for Malachi to wake up from his nap I was thinking about this simple idea, the responsibility that each one of us have, those who have gone and seen, to share. I realized that it is my responsibility not just to share in a blog or with churches, but with Malachi.
Judges 2.10 brings a horrifying shift in Israel’s history, “And all that generation also were gathered to their fathers. And there arose another generation after them who did not know the Lord or the work that he had done for Israel.” It goes on to say that they turned away from God and worshiped Baal and other terrible things. Why did this happen? I believe the point is that they weren’t told all the things God had done for them. They weren’t told about how they were rescued from Egypt, how they walked across dry land through the Red Sea, they weren’t told how God met them at Saini… they simply weren’t told.
As I was thinking I was able to make a connection between Brooke’s song and this passage in Judges. Whether it be a child’s story from Rwanda, or a personal experience from India, these stories must be told- those filled with sorrow, happiness, regret, anger, joy; those where God’s hand is so present and those where faith was tested and prevailed because it “seemed” that God wasn’t there. I want Malachi to be able to decide for himself who God is to him and what role he will have in his life. My part? To be faithful to share where God has taken me, where he has taken us. I need to be sure that I am continually telling Malachi the realities of the world, the reality that God is in the midst of it all, that he is good. Because God is SO good!
Feb
11
Eric’s Knee Surgery
Filed Under Eric, Home Again
Guess based on the response of “what! Eric had knee surgery”, we didn’t do a good job of communicating that this event was going to take place.
Why did this happen you ask?
Eric’s freshmen year of college he hurt his knee, being the muscle man that he is, he was lifting when it happened. Since then it has been “uncomfortable”, his words not mine, and he continually had to straighten it out to release the pressure that had built up. If you have ever sat across from him at a restaurant and been kicked under the table, accidentally of course, this was the reason. Because of this continual discomfort, and the fact that he wanted to get it fixed before we went in to full time missions, it was time for surgery. Dr Gwo-chin Lee did a speedy job, entering in two places removing lose, broken cartilage which was behind Eric’s knee cap. Recovery was two days of crutches and a few days of mild walking with some exercises. He is feeling great, sometimes a little stiff after being on it for a while, taking very few of the 60 percocet pills he was prescribed and getting antsy about being stuck inside and not being able to play in the four feet of snow outside our house. We’ll see how it all really went when he fully recovers. For now, Malachi and I are simply enjoying the time we get to spend with him!
So there you have it, that is why there was surgery, how it went and how he is doing now. If you knew about the surgery, thank you for praying, if not… it’s not your fault, we didn’t tell you. =)
Feb
10
Our tickets are purchased and we’re ready to go… well, not quite yet!
We leave from Philadelphia on Easter Sunday at 8:00am and arrive in Denver at 10:30am!! It seems unreal to think that it’s finally set. As we prepare to get ready to leave I have been challenged greatly on going with a servant’s heart. I question most of the time if I have one.
Eric had knee surgery last Friday and has been recuperating since then. The first few days he was on crutches and simply couldn’t walk around much. At this time Malachi also decided (well, obviously he didn’t decide) that he was going to be extra fussy and not want to sleep much. There were many times I found myself getting so frustrated with my situation that I took it out on Eric. I was put in the position where I had to take care of both my boys, something I should have delighted in doing, and instead I was irritable and completely joyless. I felt challenged that if I can’t lovingly serve my family, then how on earth can I be willing to serve people I don’t even know yet. Great question!
Jesus, help me lovingly serve my husband and my son. I need nothing back. Help me to love boldly with your love.
Feb
8
A smile and a safety coo
Filed Under Eric, Home Again
It’s simply amazing:
What a smile from your son can do – no matter what kind of day you have had or what mood you are in, all you can do is well up with love and joy when your baby boy looks right into your eyes and gives you the biggest smile.
And when you are holding him close after a time of crying and in his state of vulnerability and complete dependence gives you a look and a coo that says so loud – I feel safe with you and I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.
It makes me think how often I look up to my heavenly father with that type of smile, with a safety coo saying I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else but in your presence.
I am beginning to only slightly understand how that must make him feel.
Feb
4
March 30, 2005 I got on a plane to Kona, Hawaii. Little did I know, life as I knew it would never be the same…
“Taste and see that the Lord is GOOD” Psalm 34.8a
If I could describe my Discipleship Training School (DTS) in one word it would be ownership. For the first time I was truly challenged with the question, “why do I believe what I believe?” I grew up in the church, knew all the “right” answers, but there was a part of me that wasn’t sure why I believed it. Had I simply become a product of my environment? This isn’t completely bad, mind you. I believe that growing up as I did protected me from a lot. Plus, it laid the foundation which got me to where I am today. There came a time, however, where I had to own it. Through lectures on The Father Heart of God, Global Missions, Hearing God’s Voice (you mean God wants to talk to me!?), Inductive Bible Study and many more like this, my heart and mind were challenged and stretched. I wanted to believe what I believed not because my parents believed them, not because I learned them at church, but because I came to the conclusions through reading the Word of God and experiencing the reality of it in my life; because I had tasted and seen that the Lord is good. During outreach where I went to Indonesia and Thailand doing Tsunami relief I saw people who had so little, but who truly knew who God was in their life, and this was enough. I began to see God move in ways I never had before, heard him speak to me in ways I have never experienced before. I learned that God is so much more than someone you pray to at bed time and hear about on Sundays. He wanted to be a part, a major part of my every day life. He wanted me to talk to him as I was cleaning the beach of rubble, he wanted me to ask him who to talk to when we were visiting the relief camps. Each time I did, I saw or heard him answer. I learned that God truly is so much more than the God of the Bible, but alive and active and beckoning me to join him in what he is already doing. What an exciting revelation!
It is because of this that I am so excited to get back in to ministry. God has continually stirred my heart for discipleship, to help others experience a similar revelation to the one I had. I want to walk with people, drawing out their passions, talents, dreams and abilities in to all that God has for them. He specifically has given me a heart for the same school that completely rocked my world. T bring others along, not simply to hear and read, but to taste and see that the Lord is good!
Jan
28
Re-cap
Filed Under Amy, Home Again
I spent some time this morning looking over past blogs, from the different places God has taken us and was reminded so clearly of his faithfulness. At a time when I feel physically and emotionally spent, this was refreshing. The week so far has been a mix of emotions: great joy in seeing family that I haven’t seen in so long to great sorrow in the closure that came at Papa’s funeral. I feel like we ran from one thing to another and now as the dust settles all I can see is clothes, bags and everything else we traveled with for four days thrown all over (and we’re leaving again for the weekend Friday night!). I want so badly to be in cleaning mode, but even more so wish I had little chipmunks and birds who could help me, just like in the Disney movies. Maybe if I go take a nap when I wake up it will all be taken care of? Probably not.
I realized as I’ve been rambling that my point from the beginning was looking over the past to give encouragement for the future. I highly recommend this. God doesn’t just do amazing things overseas, but right here, right now. In reading about my time in India I remembered just how much God wants to be involved in the “mundane” aspects of life. So, that being said, I think I’ll go clean up and instead of chipmunks or birds, I’ll be cleaning with God.
Jan
22
A Flag, Half-Mast
Filed Under Amy, Home Again
A flag, half-mast, blowing in the silent wind whipping through the valley. That’s all that is left in Virginia. No more watching the birds feed or seeing the way the sun made the flowers dance. No more walks to the pond through the tall grass or late night bowls of ice cream. It’s not just the end of a life, but the end to a chapter in life. It’s funny, with one loss I feel the loss of two. Grandy and Papa, the names always came together and every time I heard them there seemed to be a peace that came in the room. I know it sounds weird, but you know that feeling where with just a hug, or even a smile, the whole world gets better? That’s kind of how it was.
Papa was the strong and silent type, don’t get me wrong, his love was abounding. He loved to help people, especially when he could fix something. I’m pretty sure Papa got an extra measure of God’s creative/creating heart, he truly had a gift. When he and Grandy moved from New Jersey to Virginia I joked that it was because he ran out of space to build new things, I still think that was partly true.
It’s hard to think that Malachi will never get to experience the things I did in Fort Valley with Papa, I guess the gun shooting isn’t such a bad thing for him to miss out on. I am thankful, however, that he got to meet him, just a day after Christmas. He was held and just for a moment was able to feel his love radiate through his being. I cringe to think I didn’t get a picture of them.
Malachi does have a Papa, my dad, and he has big shoes to fill. He will have to take Malachi fishing, and show him how to make apple cider from freshly picked apples. He will have to teach Malachi how to drive a tractor and adjust the telescope just right to see the planets in the sky. He will, and when Malachi is older and I share with him the things I did with my Papa, he will understand. I am thankful that my Papa’s legacy lives on, that memories can’t die and that one day we will see him again.
Jan
14
We’ve started support team building for Denver in full throttle. Phone calls are made, some appointments are set up, its time to meet people face to face and ask them to join our support team!
Way easier said than done!
The phone calls were scary (which I didn’t even make), and the thought of sitting down in someone’s house and telling them what we need and asking them to be a part in making it happen, well, I feel nervous just writing it down. In the midst of uncertainty I have a peace knowing we’re taken care of.
Eric has talked to his Boss and it “just so happens” that he used to be a missionary with Campus Crusade for Christ. Not only that but it “just so happens” that one of his jobs was to train the staff in support raising. He has offered to sit down with us and help us walk through what we would say when meeting with someone. Honestly, it removes some anxiety.
Most incidences that are a “just so happens” sort of thing I believe are set up by God to guide us. I am very excited to be mentored on how to effectively do this! We want to truly honor God in how we go about raising support, after all, its all God’s money, right?! So why not do things his way.
I know so many people are waiting on, or counting on God to help them achieve something, whether it be financial, relational, emotional etc. I have been so encouraged and blessed knowing that God is taking care of us. I hope you feel that as well.
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